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My partner likes to watch truly disgusting porn and I need him to stop

DEAR DEIDRE: MY partner has long had an obsession with porn – and not just the “normal” stuff.

The porn he likes to watch involves people playing with each other’s faeces.

The porn he watches is downright filthy

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The porn he watches is downright filthyCredit: Alamy

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Not only that, I have found a video of him doing stuff on the toilet that is not normal behaviour.

We are both in our late thirties and I really do love him.

But me finding out about this weird obsession of his is really affecting our relationship, as well as our sex life together.

He knows it’s not normal and says he wants to get out of these habits.

Can he still change at our age?

DEIDRE SAYS: Try not to judge him.

Coprophilia – the term for his interest – usually has its roots way back in earlier life.

Whatever the causes, it isn’t his fault – even though it is distressing for you.

And you might even feel a sense of betrayal over this.

My e-leaflet on Fetish Worries can help and talking to a therapist would allow your husband to better understand his obsession.

He can also find help from the College of Sexual & Relationship Therapists (020 8106 9635, cosrt.org.uk).

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